A million unanswered questions

a million questions in my head,
which only you can answer...
one moment you seem infront of me,
and the next moment you are gone...
i continue to stare in empty space,
without a single assurance from your side...

there is this small flickering hope alive,
which burns me everytime i hold it near...
scalded hands is all i get,
but some wounds i hold too dear...
a million questions in my head,
which only you can answer...

when you are around i feel happy,
when you are not, i wait...
hoping im just not aware of your presence,
i continue to delude myself...
those times when reality sinks in,
i realise maybe you have never been around...
what if it is but a misinterpretation,
just a mirage i was tempted to believe...
in realisation i shed silent tears,
ive been the fool again...
a million questions in my head,
which only you can answer...

To drive them all away i try,
into a secret box up there...
locked with a promise never to open again,
but catch up with me, they always seem,
as i stand near the box unaware...

seeping through the narrow creaks,
they encircle to tie me around...
helpless i try to let myself loose,
but the more i try, the more im bound...
and then a voice from the box asks,
"do you really wanna let go?"
and i stand wideeyed without an answer,
because perhaps the answer to that is 'no'...
a million questions in my head,
which only you can answer...

you are the gust of wind that can never stay,
no matter how much i want...
you are the twinkle of the bright lit star,
and you will disapear when its dawn...
i can never be sure its you again,
you are the mysterious phantom with a mask...
to say what i feel i sometimes fear,
because shunned you may just disappear...
a million questions in my head,
which only you can answer...

i cant figure what you are afraid of,
you leave me doubting myself...
is my heart playing tricks again?
letting me believe what i want to?


but there is a strange solace within my soul,
that the gust of air is you...
that the twinkle of the star is you...
that the phantom in the mask in you...
but a deep remorse lies somewhere too,
why cant the gust of wind blow me away?
why cant the twinkle of the star light up my day?
why cant the phantom in the mask give me a cue?
why cant this friendly stranger just tell me its 'you'?
a million questions in my head,
which only you can answer...

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This Post is being written for THE POETRY CONTEST at Blogjunta as a part of WOMEN & BLOGGING month.